As a Sex Therapist who writes, talks and teaches about sexuality, sometimes I still get questions from readers and clients that surprise me.
The most shocking thing isn’t the slew of downright strange questions (of which there are many) but the fact that most of the questions that find their way into my inbox and practice are very common sex questions that I assume most adults know by now.
Will a vibrator damage my clitoris?
How do I make my partner stop watching porn?
Does penis size matter? Is an uncircumcised penis normal? There is no end.
For an educator, it can be frustrating. I put so much information out there only to have the same questions asked again and again.While it can be maddening, it highlights how deeply sexual shame is ingrained in our minds and culture.
People have the information at their fingertips, right there on the internet, but it still doesn’t land.The fact that these questions are still being asked isn’t the fault of the people asking them.
In fact, I’m sure you’ll read some of the examples below and realize you yourself don’t know the answer to at least one. This lack of knowledge into the most basic of sex questions says much less about the people asking them and much more about the state of sex ed.
We’re doing ourselves a great disservice as a country by making comprehensive sex ed impossible to access.It’s not your fault you’re confused; it’s our culture’s fault.
With that being said, here are five of the most surprising questions adults still ask me about sex:
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